Man Discovers Wife’s Kindle Is Just ‘Wall-to-Wall Tattooed Criminals’

Published:  March 20, 2025

CHARLOTTE, NC— Local husband Greg Morrison thought his wife, Emily, was an avid reader of classic literature. That belief was shattered late Tuesday night when he accidentally opened her Kindle and found himself staring into a digital den of sin.

“I always thought she was reading, like, Pride and Prejudice or Little Women,” Morrison admitted, still visibly shaken. “But no. It’s just page after page of tattooed criminals, mafia bosses, and emotionally damaged ex-Navy SEALs who ‘don’t do relationships.’”

The discovery occurred when Morrison, 37, reached for his wife’s Kindle, intending to check the weather. Instead, he found himself face-to-face with a shirtless man gripping a pistol and a woman who ‘should know better’ pressed against a concrete wall.

“The first book was called Ruthless Vows,” he recounted. “I thought maybe it was an anomaly. Then I kept scrolling. Twisted Sins, Savage King, Vicious Protector—it never stopped.”

Further investigation revealed that Emily, a mild-mannered PTA volunteer by day, had spent the last six months exclusively reading about leather-clad criminals growling possessive threats at women named Ivy, Scarlett, or Savannah.

Morrison expressed particular concern about a highlighted passage in one book, which read:
"He was everything she should run from—violent, dangerous, untouchable. But when he told her she belonged to him, her knees went weak, and she whispered back, ‘Yes, Daddy.’”

“I just…” Morrison trailed off, looking at his hands. “I don’t even know what to say.”

Emily, however, was unfazed by her husband’s discovery.

“He can judge all he wants,” she said, adjusting her blanket. “Meanwhile, I’m over here experiencing a level of romance and intensity that Greg hasn’t delivered since he asked if I ‘wanted anything from the gas station’ last week.”

Despite Morrison’s attempts to downplay the situation, family members say he has been acting noticeably different since the revelation.

“He keeps rolling his sleeves up,” Emily reported. “And the other day, he walked into the kitchen and tried to call me ‘little one.’ I had to tell him not like that.”

At press time, Morrison was seen searching Amazon for ‘how to glower effectively’, while Emily downloaded her next series:  Guardians of Mayhem MC

Want to experience the obsession for yourself?

Get Hope Stone's complete MC romance collection featuring brooding alphas and exactly the kind of possessiveness your Kindle craves. 


 

 


Back to blog

Leave a comment

Disclaimer

The Smut Report is author Hope Stone's satirical romance news site. All articles, headlines, and quotes are purely fictional and intended for entertainment purposes only. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental (but hilariously unfortunate). We’re not here to spread misinformation—just laughter, love, and maybe a little lust. Proceed with a sense of humor.